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The best age to be heartbroken for a man is 20-25. Anything above that spells a disaster.

If you are a man and older than 25 and you have not been heartbroken thank God, but prepare to be heartbroken. It is one thing God put women on earth to do. You have to cry. Premium tears. Guaranteed.

Today I spent with my day with a 50-old man, recently divorced. It puzzled me that at 50, he lives in our apartment where it is mostly younger people, late 20s and 30s live. But today, as he fixed his car and I was cleaning mine, we got talking and it was a revelation. He told me he has left all his property to his wife, and has to start from zero(he has means no doubt) but now the only thing he wants is peace of mind. He has a nice 25-year-old to keep him busy in the mean time. But my take away lesson is that, 50 is not a good age to learn about the nature of women.

So if you are a man here younger than 25, omba uachwe kwa mataa. Ile design you drink yourself silly, smoke all the weed in the world and even question your sexual orientation. Of older men than 25 and you are yet to be hurt, pray it happens sooner.

Because if the heartbreak comes after 35, it can mess you a good one.

Every day I meet men who think they are immune to these things. Men who think their wives are chaste. That their wives are faithful and shit like that. They don’t know their wives dress better for their office boyfriend, or the wife is planning a whole future with another man. The blissful ignorance of some men here is quite baffling. Yet, their wife has checked out mentally, but she is forcing the man to pay all the bills, furnish her lifestyle and next year May, the man will be divorced and it will be an ugly blindsided.

Dear men. Please wake up. Open your eyes. Don’t make women the centre of your lives. Don’t trust 💯. Just don’t be stupid. You are not dealing with a normal person. Your wife will turn the devil on you and you will not know what hit you bro.

But when it happened be sober, count your loses and be like with the 50 year old man. Get a 25 year old woman and have fun as you contemplate life.

By Silas Nyachwani

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